Phase Five
We've come a long way along our journey to a spiritual awakening. We've done inner work that on a cultural level is unheard of. We've dug down and found the fears which cause us to react to the outer environment instead of responding from the guidance of our connected Self, the things which keep us trapped in the illusions of the world. Now we come to the part of our journey where we begin to walk in oneness with God.
This may not be evident from a reading of this tenth step: continue to take personal inventory, and when we are wrong, promptly admit it. So how does keeping tabs on yourself bring you closer to God?
By showing you who or what you are not.
In Richard Rohr's book Breathing Underwater he suggests that soul and consciousness are one and the same. I like to use the word awareness, as there are many forms of consciousness. The Buddhist meditative practice of the observer is one in which we begin to move beyond thought into awareness itself. It is within awareness that thought arises. And this is what the practice of this phase moves us into, awareness.
Continue to take personal inventory. We watch ourselves, our actions, our thoughts and from where the thoughts arise. We do not judge our self. We observe. And if we do judge, we observe ourselves judging and become willing to release it. As we practice this we become increasingly seated in the observer, in awareness itself. We begin to move from the neural pathways of the ego's fear-based thought system into the open awareness of the soul. We become again as children.
And when we are wrong, we promptly admit it. This does not necessarily mean admit being wrong to another person. It is far more important that we are able to admit to our self when we are wrong. Part of the ego's method of self preservation is to justify its fear based thought system. This keeps our consciousness mired in illusion and delusion. If we harm someone, we make an amends, but we can be “wrong” without harming another.
Here I substitute “when we deviate from conscious contact” for “wrong”, because that is when our actions drift from God's perfection. This deviation will become easier to observe as we practice the next phase and improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power. In this way we can feel when our contact has been compromised and know why.
So when we are “wrong”, we use the tools we have learned in the phase two inventory to trace it to its source. And this is where the dynamic of the key (phase three) and the catalyst (phase five) comes into play. Identify the fear-based thoughts and actions that move us from the coherent state, and become willing to let them go. Anger, greed, lust, self-seeking – whatever the case may be – become willing to release it to God. If the hold is strong, then pray for the willingness to release it. If the hold is extra strong, then pray for the willingness to be willing.
Then turn to God by breathing into the heart center and connecting with the expansive energetic presence there, establishing a state of heart-mind coherence. That connection centers us in present moment awareness, where conscious contact is a reality, and our shortcomings have been removed. Through this process, we are rewiring neural pathways (called neural plasticity), using the ego as a catalyst or trigger, to function in conjunction with Higher mind.
from the Lachlen Paul French translation of The Gospel According to
Thomas, passage 98
Achieving the Expansive Divine Awareness requires personal fortitude and persistence; because a person must eradicate the ego’s imbedded mental patterns and personality habits that hide our pure Awareness from view. But this eradication of ego patterns is accomplished by looking to our inner Fire to burn these patterns out of our daily life.
Your Fortitude and Persistence is focused inward. This inner focus will do the eradicating of our ego patterns. The small will-power of the ego mind, when it’s directed toward ending its own habits, is not where we find the power to transcend. That power is found in our Divine Soul.
So this person practices utilizing incisive discernment into his own nature, to discover its currents and shadows, to find his weaknesses and temptations. He brings all his powers of focus into the Home of his divine Breath awareness, to know as much about himself as he does about his profession. This way he can live each moment freely without being run by his ego’s agenda.
He practices employing a decisive WILL to focus his Attention on
Divine Being within, And in doing so will delete his ego’s ingrained habits one by one, as they are observed in consciousness.
He does this to develop excellence in his life—striking DEATH BLOWS to his old habits and old identifications; such as pessimism, fear, and laziness; which only serve as road blocks to transformation.
Then one day, his ego identification is simply eliminated altogether.